OK, Jerilynne, now you’ve done it. You’ve gone off the deep end, right? You spend gobs of time focusing on how to bring kindness into the world, to get people to understand how kindness can transform their lives. And you write a post asking whether it will ALWAYS work?
And you know why? Because it is a question I was asked. When I said “yes, it always works” the person looked at me as if I had grown horns and was breathing fire. He said “it can’t always work, nothing always works. I’ve tried what you said and it hasn’t done a thing”.
I could see he was discouraged because he truly does his best to be a Kindness Warrior and I honor him for that commitment. I’m so proud of the choice he has made to BE the difference he wants to see in the world. And I wanted to help him continue on his path because, you see, I believe it is VITAL to having peace and harmony in the world.
So I asked him two questions and they are the same questions for you to think about.
- What are you expecting to happen?
- What do you mean by “work”?
His response was “I didn’t get any response…no smile, no change, no thank you, no nothing. The person looked at me as if I came from another planet and even seemed to be scared of me”.
With his response, he gave me the clue to helping him with the next step on his path and it is simple, if not easy. Wanna know what the trick is?
It is letting go of your expectations and definitions.
That is all it takes.
When we focus on what we want to happen because of a kindness shared, we’re darned near guaranteed to be disappointed. Because we rarely, if ever, get to see the final outcome. Many of the things we do happen in a quick second…a thank you to a stranger, a few kind words, putting the grocery cart away, giving a helping hand…and then we’re gone. On to our next task or place to be.
We don’t know if our “thank you” is the one that turns the person’s day around and causes them to be kind to the next person in the checkout lane. Or our kind words mean the person treats their partner or child with kindness when they get home. And because of that kindness, the kid treats the other neighborhood kids more gently or….
Giving a kindness without expectation is like the pebble you throw into a pond…you have no idea how far the ripple effect will travel and no idea of the final outcome. You simply do it because you find it important and kindness is what you chose to focus on.
So, keep on BEING kindness, knowing, trusting, it will have the intended effect…raising the balance in the Universal Bank of Kindness (U B OK) and skyrocketing the world’s positive energy.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on whether kindness works…so leave your comment and let me know. Whether you agree, or disagree, I love hearing from you!
Love and light, hugs and blessings